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single11-Nov-1997sex/relationshipshunter by votes64949.2%

  What is the single most important element of a romantic relationship?



VotesAnswer
22emotional connection (friendship, love, etc.)
16trust
8mutual respect
7other (please comment)
3compatible relationship structure preference (mono, poly, etc.)
2shared goals
1sexual compatibility
1shared activities/hobbies
0equitable contribution (financial, time, emotional)
0similar opinions/tastes
0religious/cultural compatibility

UserComment
babeeco
posted 12-Nov-1997 12:23am  

If you feel connected you can build other things together
bill Survey Central Gold SubscriberGold Star Survey Creator
posted 12-Nov-1997 7:49am  

I said "trust" because it's the closest to "commitment" (what I thought of when I read the question), of course I'm answering the question as if there was a "that lasts" on the end of it (and that's what's important to me).
mcarlos
posted 13-Nov-1997 1:05am  

as the pizza joint down the block professes 'love is it' - that doesn't mean you don't get screwed, discouraged, or always have someone to enjoy the rain with. but it does allow you to feel connected to the wonderful vastness of existence in a beautiful and powerful way. i believe it provides the strength of commitment, the ability and reason to endure (and go to bed speaking). love propells self growth, and demands growth of the other while accepting the relationship as it exists at the moment. i think all this is worth getting burned, no?
steve
posted 13-Nov-1997 7:43pm  

Most of these are important to one degree or another, but the ability to keep me interested is #1 for me.
jefff
posted 16-Nov-1997 2:15pm  

...who has to clean up, and who has to pay for breakage?
Twanger
posted 17-Nov-1997 2:04pm  

In my youthful idealism i would like to think that all the others spring from the first one.
Jimmy
posted 18-Nov-1997 1:46am  

Trust, but sex was a VERY close second (=!
Stalin
posted 18-Nov-1997 6:23pm  

As far as compatible relationship structure (mono, poly) is concerned, I always try to get Boardwalk and Park Place.
Jaime
posted 19-Nov-1997 2:57am  

The most important thing is that both must be romantic!!
fiore
posted 1-Dec-1997 5:40pm  

I never had a relationship so I wouldn't know. BUT from what people tell me trust and honesty is veyr high on the list...
Dahlia
posted 2-Dec-1997 2:10am  

It's kind of hard to pin point it. It's a bit of everything mixed together.. that's what makes it so hard to find a good mate.
ear
posted 2-Dec-1997 8:10pm  

Without trust, all the others are limited. With trust, you can feel free to really open yourself up to your partner(s).
jennj
posted 2-Dec-1997 8:15pm  

All is important, but I want a friend first, and everything else that's really important should come with that. I realize this is a high hope, but when I finally meet the right "friend" most of the things I desire will just be there. (or I'll be alone. so sad. so sad.)
seanhuxter
posted 4-Dec-1997 12:13pm  

Having been in only a handful of relationships, I'd have to say the ones that lasted longer had a vital element of mutual respect. This also covers the emotional connection in my opinion. Oh, and sex! Lots of it!
llyra
posted 22-Dec-1997 2:07pm  

you really need more than one of these, in equal measure, to have a successful relationship, imho.
Dolemite
posted 2-Mar-1998 2:11am  

I think a strong emotional bond is very important.
elijahblue
posted 6-Mar-1998 12:47am  

cuddling and snuggling
joe
posted 20-Mar-1998 3:47pm  

i dont know, never had one
nbarone
posted 29-Apr-1998 8:53pm  

without emotional connection, its just a relationship, not romantic
daver
posted 13-May-1998 6:53pm  

Urk...there are several that are essential, but trust comes first for me...
jjg
posted 17-May-1998 2:29pm  

Trust. Which naturally includes honesty.
phi
posted 30-Jun-1998 11:22am  

Ooh, hard one. I chose 'shared goals' because it can include all the others that are important to me (namely emotional connection, mutual respect, compatible relationship structure, and trust).
dpolicar
posted 11-Aug-1998 12:38pm  

this was hard to answer.
At first I wanted to say "trust" because it's the one I resonate with most emotionally. Then I thought "emotional connection" because a romantic relationship without it strikes me as a contradiction in terms. Then I decided that was cheating (I mean, I could just as well have picked "other" and written "the existence of all parties involved in the relationship," and that would be true enough, but somehow would miss the point.) So I went back to trust. Then I saw "mutual respect" and considered the possibility of a relationship where there wasn't much trust but we knew we respected each other, vs. one where we trusted but didn't respect each other, and somewhat queasily decided on the former over the latter.



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